Friday, April 24, 2015

Waiting

I'm in a really strange state right now. I'm waiting to hear about something--have been waiting for a while--and I feel like I can't do anything else until I do.

It is not, of course, the case that I can't do anything. I can do plenty. I can work on my chapter, for example, which I'm trying to do--but working on my chapter means that I'm working on the computer, which means that I can keep checking email and noodling around distracting myself or, more accurately, indulging my heightened state of distraction.

It's a problem of not being able to envision the future. I need to know this thing right now and there is NOTHING I CAN DO ABOUT IT arrrrgh gah powerlessness no control maybe I'll go buy something. (Nope, already indulged that impulse once and won't do it again. Not today, anyway.)

I'm sorry to be so cryptic. This post serves no purpose except to further indulge my distraction and give me the space to complain for a minute about NOT KNOWING AND LOSING MY MIND.

5 comments:

Sisyphus said...

Dude I SO KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN!!!!!

I got a thing to do today and then will send you a commiserating email.

heu mihi said...

Please do! I need to commiserate with someone other than my husband, because I think we're just compounding each other's stress.

I'm at the point of interpreting every single thing that happens as a sign--I saw a rabbit! Good sign! The rabbit only has one eye! Bad sign! But now it's nursing a nest of baby rabbits! Good sign! Etc.

Sisyphus said...

Rabbit...?

What Now? said...

Let us know what happens!

heu mihi said...

Regardless of its omen potential, the nursing rabbits were awfully cute, at least.